i'm sorry to hear about your predicament and coming from someone who has always been so cheerful and strong, i must say things must be very bad. but the good thing is when you reach rock bottom, you can only bounce upwards.(except for alan i guess). that is what makes good times feel really good. if it is any consolation, i can say that most of us have been through what u have been through and somehow, we always get over it. all we need is to complaint and whine, and then it all just goes away.and when it does, it only makes us stronger and wiser. all the best and we are all ears if u are in need of a shoulder punch. p/s although we may not have specialised training, keep in mind that we come free!